c'mon where are you. my life lately.
me. sleep less. me play outside today. me take naps. me go to school. me drive a little more than usual and feel bad about it. the weather though has created a sense of needing not to drive an auto. eh. not much else.

lately i have been thinking about how i would like to regain some spanish skills. perception, language can be integral in presenting some information. rewind: i got one valentine this year and i think it was the best ever. it had a margaret atwood and paulo cohelo quote in it. my friend abbey is going to africa on friday and wont be back until july. i will miss her and only now do i realize some of .......... keeping my head from the dizzy. i sleep less, i live more. sometimes.

chooze bronze.

i go to college. i study half-assedly. i spend time with people, but as of late mostly her. I am "trying" to go to more school. my head is okay. my roommate is clockinh his brain at 100 over his gf who broke up with him, i can see me a few months ago in him, and there is really nothing i can say to make him feel better. thats ok. i have been sleeping less. i have been eating more. i really like trees. i like the wind. i like recorded music. and the smell of oranges. i am thinking about the niceness of a wrist without a watch. about the apple, the potato, the tulip. friendships and queries.

valentines day?
guff.

So i had a wierd night, not a bad one.
should have made an effort, where i thought one wasnt wanted
should have got out the bed.

breathe in, breathe out.

i get caught in semantics. and in - of mice and men.
(best laid plans go awry.)

set em up, to knock em down.

as i put these notes to paper.

is there anyone. i feel like i am building myself up to be knocked down and perhaps I am.

or how we can only trust what people tell us and i don't like feeling that i can't trust someone, or at least its good i guess to know that i can't trust them.

i make wierd ass situations in my head of these grand visions of deceit being played against me.

or whatever.

i hadn't vomited in 7 years.
well my body still has the capacity.
i don't like poisioning myself.

i have been working.
the doc is putting me as a coauthor on a paper, neat, sorta.
i am still playing the game that is life.
am i winning or losing? my game is not played quite like that.

i have been playing the guitar.
how are you?

i have my conception,
and you yours.
i wonder where they meet and where they don't.

i am not going to run,
i might cry.

sooner or later you'll have to choose.
I have been reading and thats great.
eating a lot of tofu.
and just having fun.
went sledding.

with all of these lights and, now, the snow the sky is purple at night. no real night time. can there be a real day then?

i have been looking at trees alot.